130. Travelling again! + Small post-surgery update SS

Heya!

This post is going to be of the short type, as I have a very busy evening ahead after a super hectic morning. I hope I won't need to write these small updates often, as I'd like to focus on the main content and head theme of this blog (as tumbled as they are...). But today I just needed to have you all aware that after this bizarre day, I'm going to travel with my family again, for two days.

To Tallinn, Estonia!

I haven't been to inland Estonia more than once, and that one time was during summer 2014. I fell in love with the Old Town (as it was the only place we explored), it was so supremely beautiful! The food was amazing, and the sunlit, golden streets and the friendly people made it to my dearest memories, along with a can of free Coca Cola where I put my Neitsitorn stickers, and some souvenirs I still want to add to my room! Now we're going back, to the same spa hotel as back then, and hopefully silly things of the funny type will happen, just as back then!

There is only one thing concerning my ability to travel. I went to the doctor today, to show her my infection that is supposed to have healed long ago. Turns out, it still festers and recently it was super painful, so painful that I couldn't take a shower to wash the area. The doctor told me the surgery probably didn't go that well, in fact, it had gone all wrong.

They took a bacteria sample and sent it to the laboratories, while I was just in shock. I got a couple antibiotics to help the wound and the scar tissue to heal, but it looks like I'll need another surgery, as antibiotics are no miracle-doers for me. They just give me a terrible stomach ache, which is a hard price to pay if they don't even work. We'll have to see if the wound closes and the festering stops, but if not, I'll be having one more turn at Jorv hospital.

Nevertheless, I don't give negativity a chance but instead focus on the good sides of today - and the days to come! I'll of course be bringing me my Olympus SLR to snap some pictures with, to tell you a story through pictures from the beautiful city! Oh, and the items I bought are also going to do their part in telling how the trip went! ☺

I'll get back to planning and packing, and getting ready for the gym my Mum and I are hitting in the evening. But first, coffee! ☺

Talk to you later! Take care lovelies! ♥

See you!

129. To make a winter day sunnier! SS

Hi!

It's the first 'official' day of the winter holidays of 2017! After so many things happening, from my depression to Wanhat (which is on my list of posts to make!) I think I - like we all! - deserve a week to breathe and rest. My family's got plans, big and small, which fits perfectly to my return into blogging! I will try my best to keep you up to date, as I am to do now! ☺

I woke up quite early - 4 a.m. so to say... I went downstairs to play my beloved World of Warcraft with my beloved Bimbo that decided to accompany me on the sofa. I was wrapped in a wonderful blanket I got from Ikea about half a year ago, a blanket which Bimbo cannot resist. It was difficult to see him in the dark, but the loud purring he let out told me the essentials, that he was a happy kitty! ☺

After falling asleep for a while and waking up again, I felt that this day was going to be amazing. Even though I slipped on the ice outside while taking Ella for her morning walk, I had a feeling this day would be the great start of a great winter holiday. Today I went to see La La Land with my cousin Aukku to Helsinki, a movie I know only from the commercials that show on the TV. I haven't been watching romantic comedies in ages, let alone musicals, but this was a wonderful surprise! I really enjoyed the movie, it made my heart bounce in the rate of dreams and hopes the story told about! The only thing I thought was against my heart was that it should've ended where the happy bit ended too! Otherwise, if you don't mind the length of a movie being of the longer side, then I recommend it warmly!

Later we went to Kamppi, and on our way out of the cinemas I decided to take a few pictures of the city around. I have developed this habit to take photos of my surroundings (or even selfies) when a day has been good, and today was that day! So here is a few photos of the ordinary Helsinki weather around 6 o'clock!

I also wanted to try out the Jungle Juice Bar for the first time ever, a super spontaneous but good decision! My pick for my first drink was one called Strawberry Fields, which contained strawberries, apples and oranges, and I definitely want to taste out the rest of the list - especially, now that I'm on my way to get healthy, I want to give their super smoothies a try!

Tomorrow is a nice, new day, full of things to do. Although those things are all regarding health, I look forward to the day regardless! I wish to wake up early to get my blood elf on WoW into the high-level areas I've wanted to go to for a long time - early in the morning with a cup of steaming hot coffee!

I'll see you all soon!

 

128. The life today SS

Hello there!
I don't authentically know how to begin this blog post. I have been away for almost a month now, and it feels like an immensely long a time... which you could expect after my last post. I believe I owe you a newer, fresher post explaining what's been going on after the last entry, now that I've found time to do so, finally!

First of all, the most important thing, I am feeling much, much better now than a month ago. The difference can be seen as a happy, energetic, inspired and fresh, almost a whole new me, but the internal change is even greater. For the first time ever in my life, I have forgiven myself for my mistakes. And believe it or not, I have never loved myself the way I do now - tremendously, purely, unconditionally.

I have embraced my flaws and no longer punish myself for bad memories that have happened in the past - because they indeed are in the past, not the future or the important present. I see myself as something of worth and that I can do whatever it is that I want in life. I encourage myself to dream, and think outside the box, and step out of my comfort zone. I feel good when I am being confident yet kind of heart, and after every day, I praise myself for the person I am, the long road of rocks and beaches I have travelled, and how valuable I am to my friends, family, and the world. We are all of equal worth, and now I have found myself to be one of that "all".

I also have found my strengths that I treasure, weaknesses that I accept, preferences I respect, and through the help of professionals and near friends and family, I have gradually become this human being that has found herself back from depression. I believe I have overcome the absolute worst part of depression, because I don't feel it these days - at least the very majority of these days.

Acts of kindness and self-help works have had their share as well. They prompted me to get help, as funny as it sounds. Friends and family have had the biggest impact, and my dear mother has helped me through days of desperation and teary, terrible nights. My friend Eliel has also been a huge help, for with him I can share everything, good or bad, and always know that I have a lovely friend no matter what. Elsa, Bimbo and Emi have all been purring in my lap and pushing with their heads to tell me that they love me. Ella the Dog has been a sweetheart as well, following me around the house and has given me plenty of kisses. But like everyone says, the biggest steps have been the ones I have made myself. With help, I have gotten the fearlessness to take those steps.

And now I'm here! I have seen friends, eaten well, slept like a baby, found the joy of health, pampered myself, danced with 200+ other people in a huge arena... and loved and still do love myself like never before. The road of acceptance, respect and love has been long, and though now I know that bumps on the road are part of life, I have realised I am at the correct end of the tunnel - and I'm not moving anywhere, except maybe more towards the light.

Truth be told, I have just became wiser and stronger an young adult, and although this isn't by far as bad as things I've experienced before, I am still more than happy that I have conquered this major obstacle - and that I am back better than ever!

Now, I'm more than inspired to continue with Symphonicats (I never had any doubts about this!), to grow the blog and grow as a blogger as well! I want to share updates of cats, because no update or photograph is the same as the other, and bits and pieces of my personal life to add to the lifestyle in the blog! Currently I am on my winter holidays, which lasts for the whole of next week, and I am so thrilled to have you with me throughout the week, in hopes of getting actively posting again! To be absolutely honest, I haven't been this excited over my blog for the longest time!

That's going to be it for today, I hope you got some clarification on my well-being that I feel today! Even though this was just a smaller update filled with my purest thoughts, I feel like this is the first step towards actively blogging again!

You're all incredibly wonderful (and I guess I've figured out, so am I!)! I love you all so much, take care, be safe, sending love and hugs to you all! ♥

See you soon! ♥

♥